No one knows a child as well as the parents. (When I say parents, that could also mean a child's caretaker such as grandparents or whoever is raising the child). If you think that there might be something that is not quite right, then you need to investigate it immediately. Of course, it could be nothing but what if it isn't....
DON'T be afraid of what you might find out. DO be afraid of doing nothing.
1 in 5 will experience signs and symptoms of a psychiatric disorder during the course of the year. Some nine million children have serious emotional problems at any point in tie. Yet, only 1 in 5 of these children are receiving appropriate treatment. When parents or teachers suspect that a child may have an emotional problem, they should seek a comprehensive evaluation by a mental health professional specifically trained to work with children and adolescents.Parents are natural advocates for their children. Who is your child’s first teacher? You are. Who is your child’s most important role model? You are. Who is responsible for your child’s welfare? You are. Who has your child’s best interests at heart? You do.
You know your child better than anyone else. The school is involved with your child for a few years. You are involved with your child for life. You should play an active role in planning your child’s education.
The law gives you the power to make educational decisions for your child. Do not be afraid to use your power. Use it wisely. A good education is the most important gift you can give to your child.
As the parent of a child with a disability, you have two goals:
1. To ensure that the school provides your child with a “free appropriate public education” that includes “specially designed instruction . . . to meet the [child’s] unique needs . . .” (20 U.S.C. §1401)
2. To build a healthy working relationship with the school.
Signs and symptoms of childhood and adolescent emotional problems may include:
- Anxiety or frequent worries
- Dangerous or self destructive behavior
- Excessive weight loss or gain
- Feeling sad
- Frequent fighting
- Injuring or killing animals
- Mood swings
- Obsessive thoughts or compulsive behaviors
- School problems
- Setting fires
- Stealing or lying
- Thoughts about suicide or running away
- Trouble paying attention
- Trouble sleeping
- Troubling or disturbing thoughts
- Use of drugs or alcohol
- Withdraw or isolation
Throughout the evaluation process, parents should be directly involved and ask many questions. It's important to make sure you understand the results of the evaluation, your child's diagnosis, and the full range of treatment options. If parents are not comfortable with a particular clinician, treatment option, or are confused about specific recommendations, they should consider a second opinion.
Before a child begins treatment, parents may also want to ask the following:
- Does my child need medication?
- How long should it take before I see improvement?
- How will I be involved with my child's treatment?
- How will we know if the treatment is working?
- What are the arrangements if I need to reach you after-hours or in an emergency?
- What are the recommended treatment options for my child?
- What should I do if the problems get worse?
You may also need to advocate to have your child seen in a timely way, by the most appropriate clinician. Most insurance plans now include some form of managed care, which may utilize provider panels with few mental health professionals. However, many states now have laws concerning reasonable access to specialists. If you have problems or questions, try calling the Department of Insurance, the Patient Ombudsman/Advocate, or the Department of Consumer Affairs at your insurance company.
Your Assignment—
Plan for the Future
What are your long-term goals for your child? What do you envision for your child in the future?
If you are like most parents, you are focused on the present. You haven’t given much thought to the future.
Do you expect your child to be an independent, self-sufficient member of the community? Although some children with disabilities will require assistance as adults, most will grow up to be adults who hold jobs, get married, and live independently.
If you have a vision about what you want for your child in the future, you are more likely to achieve your goals.
If you believe others will make long-term plans for your child and provide your child with the necessary skills to be an independent, self sufficient member of society, you are likely to be disappointed.
Answer Questions
What do you want for your child? What are your goals for your child's future? Do you have a master plan for your child's education?
If you want your child to grow up to be an independent adult, what does your child need to learn before he or she leaves the public school system?
What do you want?
Develop a Master Plan
If you are like many parents, you don't have a master plan. You don't know where you are, where you need to go, or how to get there. Do not expect school personnel to make long-term plans for your child -- this is your responsibility.
Begin by thinking about your vision for your child's future. What are your long-term goals for your child? What will your child need to learn? What services and supports will your child need to meet these goals?
Ongoing parental involvement and support are essential to the overall success of treatment. Depending on the nature of your child's problems, it may also be important to involve the school, community agencies, and/or juvenile justice system. In addition, it may be helpful to learn how to access other support services such as respite, parent skill building, or home-based programs. Local advocacy groups can also provide valuable information, experience and support for parents.
Go with your gut. You are the one that lives with the child daily. You see things that other people don't. Don't let yourself get talked out of seeking answers and help. Be your child's advocate before the problem is even identified. You don't want to look back later and regret not acting sooner.
Although serious emotional problems are common in childhood and adolescence, they are also highly treatable. By advocating for early identification, comprehensive evaluation and appropriate intervention, parents can make sure their children get the help they need, and reduce the risk of long term emotional difficulties.
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