Multiracial Children

Multiracial kids are one of the fastest growing segments of the U.S. population. The number of mixed-race families in America is steadily increasing, due to a rise in interracial marriages and relationships, as well as an increase in trans-racial and international adoptions. Publicity surrounding prominent Americans of mixed cultural heritage, such as athletes, actors, musicians, and politicians, has highlighted the issues of multicultural individuals and challenged long-standing views of race. However, despite some changes in laws and evolving social attitudes, multiracial kids still face significant challenges.

Unfortunately, it is also important to prepare multiracial kids for the inevitable racial taunts that they will encounter. Share stories of racism and prejudice so that they know it’s not new, they’re not alone, it happens to everyone, and that it happens out of ignorance and from people who can’t see past their own perspectives. You can’t really shield them from it, but if you give them the tools to deal with it and a level of comfort with people of all colors, that will give them a sense of comfort in the world, a strong sense of who they are, and respect for everyone else.

Prejudice can manifest itself as early as preschool, so kids need to be given the tools to know how to deal with it and to know that they can go to their parents about it. There are universal lessons to be learned from injustice--about good and bad, and how injustice happens.

In the United States marriages between blacks and whites increased 400 percent in the last 30 years, with a 1000 percent increase in marriages between whites and Asians. In a recent survey, 47% of white teens, 60 % of black teens, and 90 % of Hispanic teens said they had dated someone of another race. And about two million American kids have parents of difference races.

Kids in a multiracial family may have different racial identities from one another. Their racial identity is influenced by their individual physical features, family attachments and support, and experiences with racial groups.

Multiracial kids in divorced families may have greater difficulties accepting and valuing the cultures of both parents.

Recent research has shown that multiracial kids do not differ from other kids in self-esteem, comfort with themselves, or number of psychiatric problems. Also, they tend to be high achievers with a strong sense of self and tolerance of diversity.

Research has shown that kids with a true multiracial or multicultural identity generally grow up to be happier than multiracial kids who grow up with a "single-race" identity.

To cope with society biases, mixed-race kids may develop a public identity with the "minority" race, while maintaining a private interracial identity with family and friends.

Some interracial families face discrimination in their communities. Some kids from multiracial families report teasing, whispers, and stares when with their family.

Parents can help their kids cope with these pressures by establishing open communication in the family about race and cultures, and by allowing curiosity about differences in skin color, hair texture, and facial features among family members. Parents can also help their kids in the following ways:

Understand that kids may have feelings of guilt or disloyalty to a parent if they choose to adopt the racial identity and/or culture of one parent. Recognize that kids may identify with different parts of their heritage at different stages of development or in varied settings in order to "fit in."

Locate books, textbooks, and movies that portray multiracial individuals as positive role models, as well as books about the lives of multicultural families.

Establish support networks for your child from the school, grandparents, relatives, neighbors, and the greater community.

Encourage and support a multicultural life for the whole family, including becoming familiar with language, traditions, and customs of all family members. Live in a diverse community where the sense of being different or unacceptable is minimized.

Assist kids with developing coping skills to handle questions and/or biases about their background. Help kids deal with racism without feeling personally assaulted.

For the majority of multiracial kids, growing up associated with multiple races and cultures is enriching, rewarding, and contributes to healthy adult adjustment. Some multiracial kids may be uncomfortable with their diverse heritages and may benefit from supportive counseling to help them clarify their feelings.

Ultimately, parenting is aimed at helping kids form a strong sense of identity and pride in themselves as individuals. It is about helping the kids feel secure and comfortable with themselves in our world. Now, how one does this is the tricky part and really depends on the family involved. Some parents foster in their kids a sense that they are true international citizens, belonging to three countries (mom’s, dad’s, and America). Others say they are true Americans, multiracial in a country of many races. Some say that they are half one ethnicity and half another. Others say that they are fully both ethnicities. Hawaiians group them together as hapas. At some level, it is just a matter of semantics. But for kids creating a place for themselves in the world, the exact semantics can be critical. The only thing that is certain is that because they are born in America, they are American and they are changing the face of America.

Being multiracial is a gift, an asset, and a privilege. It allows them to cross a lot of boundaries. You have a key to a door that most people are going to have to work very hard to know even exists. You are a child of two ethnicities so you have twice what other people have. You are not burdened with only one perspective, which is hard to see past. You can look at things more than one way because you come from more than one way.

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